TO YOU, IDLER. UP!
Though your limbs may be corpulent and weary from your sedentary repose, your head a-thunder from an evening of indulgence, your spirit weary from the wretched nine-to-five – fret not, dear man, for within these pages are strategies to replenish and rejuvenate your manly health and well-being.
Heed not those who would have you join a house of muscled exertion and toss your technological flim-flam into the long grass. Attend instead to the most gentlemanly of guides, esteemed man of letters Walt Whitman, who will advise on the most vital qualities of health and training for fellows of all ages and inclinations.
Undiscovered and unutilized for more than 150 years, here are the choice extracts from Mr Whitman's manifesto, which will provide you with a complete and exact science of manly virtue and vigour.